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Flowers for you. I once lost a kitty, too. He was my only real friend for a long time: I was 9 - 16 years old. He didn't like it whenever I cried, so I tried to imagine him wanting to comfort me and encourage me to move on without him. It helped. Having another cat also helped me through it. It was eight years ago, but I still miss him. I wish you the best in your recovery. *hugs*